Wednesday, 19 August 2009


girls, google, grass, giraffes, genie from aladdin, green, grapes, galaxy, george sampson, george clooney, germany, being giddy, glares, glass, glade air freshener, guys, guests, "ghetto"

care to hazard a guess as to where i'll be blogging about today? if you haven't gotten it yet & you're from glasgow then shame on you, didn't the armadillo give it away? but that's right, i'm blogging about GLASGOW! the home of rachael, est 1993
if you're scottish/british, then you'll know that sterotypes & assumptions made by foreigners are more often than not way way off. for example, it's a british sterotype that we all drink tea & eat crumpets and scones. i do drink tea, but it's not poured out by the butler & brought along on a silver platter in the finest china. as for the crumpet thing, i've never had one.
a scottish sterotype is that we wear kilts all the time & we all have ginger hair & we all play the bagpipes and eat haggis. along me to clear this up: people only generally wear kilts at speical occasions. believe it or not, we wear normal clothes. from normal clothes shops. weird, huh?
people who have ginger hair in scotland (well, where i live at least) are almost discriminated against. it can be funny sometimes, ridiculous yet funny.
as for the bagpipes & haggis: bagpipes are only really played at folk concerts & sometimes special occasions, like st andrews day, although sometimes in glasgow people will busk with a bagpipe & wear a kilt, but it's probably for the tourists. and if you don't know what haggis is: it's sheeps intestine. so no, we don't all eat that. some people do obviously. i am not one of them. the look of it even through the packaging is revolting
we also have a strange breed of people in scotland, neds. if you don't know what they are, allow me to explain:

imagine a 12 year old boy, 4' 12", wearing a knock off "lacoste" tracksuit & matching trainers, with the bottom of his tracksuit tucked into his tube socks. he has the first initial of his name shaved into the back of his head & he has a bottle of buckfast (revolting cider) tucked into his trouers. not the pocket, in his trousers
a man walks past reading a newspaper. the ned see's the lack of interest the man has in him & takes that as an insult. the ned then goes up to the man & starts speaking in tounges, or so it seems. "haw haw haw mahn how old ir yoo mahn pure fuckin old mahn i'm gonnie stab you haw haw" the man continues to walk on, unphased & the ned goes back to standing outside mcdonalds, taking swigs from the plastic bottle of cider. probably the most annoying things about neds is how ubiquitous they are, but they are creatures of habit, never venturing to new parks or streets to drink beer & smoke weed. it's just a case of knowing where they are = where you should avoid
if that didn't help, this video will:

(incase you didnt know, most neds are young boys, who eventually grow out of it. but you do get the occasional ned who's older than 15 & still thinks it's cool to tuck your trouers into your tube socks & sit at the back of the bus spitting & playing drum & bass from the mobile phone they stole)
but glasgow isn't all neds & graffiti. most of it is, but not all of it. glasgow can be pretty, especially at night when it's christmas, & all the christmas lights get put up. probably my favourite places in glasgow are the science museum (i'm a geek, so what?) the abc, it's the prettiest place for UCAP concerts, but the SECC is good too, kelvingrove & the botanics. they are the nicest parks. there's an art museum at kelvingrove if that's what you're into. i'm not, so i just go to the park whenever i go to kelvingrove. glasgow at christmas is the best though! every christmas me & my dad & my little brother usually go to that fancy shopping centre (it's more of a tube though. i think princes square?) and we'll sit listening to the carolers & laughing at all the rich people. we have fun. so don't be put off by the stupidity of little kids, visit glasgow. i feel like i should get paid for endorsement now...

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